TMR's all new "Tales from the Underworld" thread

[The Moan Ranger]

Nearer 3,000 apparently. Baggage manager and idiot new Duty Manager still there trying to get them out ASAP. Massive amounts of paperwork and...hilariously... the Captain of the plane is under no obligation to accept them. Getting the plane off the stand on time is all important. The fines imposed by Gatwick for late departures are enough to make the flight non-profitable.  Plus, of course, the missed bags simply won't fit on the next flight as it will be nearly full anyway.

[Steve]

Nearer 3,000 apparently. Baggage manager and idiot new Duty Manager still there trying to get them out ASAP. Massive amounts of paperwork and...hilariously... the Captain of the plane is under no obligation to accept them. Getting the plane off the stand on time is all important. The fines imposed by Gatwick for late departures are enough to make the flight non-profitable.  Plus, of course, the missed bags simply won't fit on the next flight as it will be nearly full anyway.

Oh woes, there's going to be an large blame = claim bill for Airwick Gatport when the dust settles.  Easyjet put out a story that it was a belt failure.  Believability quotient near zero.

You must have been clairvoyant at shift picking.  Any advice on tomorrows Lottery numbers?

[The Moan Ranger]

The average cost of a  "rush bag" is £30. So a bill of over £1 million for Gatwick  (after compensation is included)

[Barman]

The average cost of a  "rush bag" is £30. So a bill of over £1 million for Gatwick  (after compensation is included)

Kerrrrr-chiiiiinnnngggg! 

[The Moan Ranger]

And now BA has gone tits-up. Bet it's fun in the South Terminal today...

[Grumpmeister]

How to make sure that your passengers are calm and happy, tell them there is only a 50/50 chance of both engines working before you take off. Even if you meant to give them the option to wait for a replacement aircraft I'm guessing that communications skills are not a priority for staff... 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4593192/Easyjet-pilot-asks-passengers-VOTE-off.html

[Steve]

How to make sure that your passengers are calm and happy, tell them there is only a 50/50 chance of both engines working before you take off. Even if you meant to give them the option to wait for a replacement aircraft I'm guessing that communications skills are not a priority for staff... 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4593192/Easyjet-pilot-asks-passengers-VOTE-off.html

[Steve]

What does our real expert think about this?

Apparently Gatwick has just been rated the second worst major airport in the world (Singapore was rightly the best)

http://www.itv.com/news/meridian/2017-06-13/gatwick-airport-among-10-worst-in-the-world/

IMHO this is likely just a reflection that Brits like to moan and Gatwick has more cheap airlines than Heathrow

[Barman]

What does our real expert think about this?

Apparently Gatwick has just been rated the second worst major airport in the world (Singapore was rightly the best)

http://www.itv.com/news/meridian/2017-06-13/gatwick-airport-among-10-worst-in-the-world/

IMHO this is likely just a reflection that Brits like to moan and Gatwick has more cheap airlines than Heathrow

In my (rather limited admittedly) flying experience since moving out here I'd say that Heathrow was much worserer than Gatwick.

In fact, my experiences at Gatwick have all been quite satisfactory.*










* Apart from baggage handling obviously.

[The Moan Ranger]

Gatwick needs another runway and another another terminal - and the airlines need to pay the Ground Handlers better, with less onerous contracts. Simply putting £1 on the price of every ticket would do it. Also - make all passengers who wish to check-in bags do so 1 hour before departure, not 40 minutes. The bags take 10 minutes to get from check-in to us and then it could take another 15 minutes to get them to a remote stand.

Gatwick is constantly flat-out and its layout makes it very hard to get bags, loaders and off-loaders to planes in time.

News just in :- We've lost the easyJet contract w.e.f. 1st Nov, to DHL. 65% of our workload.

[Steve]

  . .News just in :- We've lost the easyJet contract w.e.f. 1st Nov, to DHL. 65% of our workload.

That don't sound good for your beer fund

[boogs]

News just in :- We've lost the easyJet contract w.e.f. 1st Nov, to DHL. 65% of our workload.

DHL seem to be taking over the world    They are into everything having been contracted out to them in the past in my experience not a good company to work for 

[Grumpmeister]

How on earth do you manage to forget to raise the landing gear on take off? 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/travel_news/article-4739838/Air-India-pilots-forget-raise-landing-gear.html

[Barman]

How on earth do you manage to forget to raise the landing gear on take off? 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/travel_news/article-4739838/Air-India-pilots-forget-raise-landing-gear.html

The answer was in the article...

A spokesman for Air India told the paper that the two female pilots have been suspended.

I 'spec they were yacking... 

[Darwins Selection]

How on earth do you manage to forget to raise the landing gear on take off? 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/travel/travel_news/article-4739838/Air-India-pilots-forget-raise-landing-gear.html

The answer was in the article...

A spokesman for Air India told the paper that the two female pilots have been suspended.

I 'spec they were yacking... 

Or drying their washing on the landing legs.