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Author Topic: The World's most offensive joke  (Read 15373 times)

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Online Barman

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #255 on: May 02, 2016, 04:50:51 PM »
A woman is in the hospital giving birth. The doctor takes the baby, then promptly throws it out the window. The woman screams, "My baby! You've killed my baby!".....





The doctor replies, "Jokes on you, it was already dead!"..........

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline apc2010

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #256 on: May 04, 2017, 08:29:12 AM »
Sick jokes are like kids with cancer .........






They never get old ............ redface:

Offline Steve

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #257 on: May 04, 2017, 09:48:27 AM »
facepalm:
Well, whatever nevermind

Online Barman

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #258 on: May 04, 2017, 10:02:08 AM »
Sick jokes are like kids with cancer .........






They never get old ............ redface:

 lol: lol: lol:
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Offline boogs

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #259 on: June 06, 2017, 07:05:22 AM »
Not the right place I know  redface:



Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister`s chauffeur driven car.

Suddenly a cow jumps into the road, the car hits it full on and comes to a stop.

Nicola, in her normal jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur

"You were driving, get out and see what was the matter"

The chauffeur gets out and reports, " The animal is dead".

"You were driving, go and tell the farmer" said Nicola, "I can`t afford to be blamed for anything".

The driver trudges up the track to the farmhouse and returns five hours later, totally plastered, his hair all ruffled and a big grin on his face.

"My God, what happened to you", asked Nicola.

The chauffeur replied "Well, when I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of Malt Whisky, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me"

"My God, what on earth did you say to them" asked Nicola.

"I knocked on the door and when it was answered I said " I`m Nicola Sturgeon`s chauffeur and I've killed the cow".



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Online Barman

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #260 on: June 06, 2017, 07:09:07 AM »
Not the right place I know  redface:



Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister`s chauffeur driven car.

Suddenly a cow jumps into the road, the car hits it full on and comes to a stop.

Nicola, in her normal jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur

"You were driving, get out and see what was the matter"

The chauffeur gets out and reports, " The animal is dead".

"You were driving, go and tell the farmer" said Nicola, "I can`t afford to be blamed for anything".

The driver trudges up the track to the farmhouse and returns five hours later, totally plastered, his hair all ruffled and a big grin on his face.

"My God, what happened to you", asked Nicola.

The chauffeur replied "Well, when I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of Malt Whisky, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me"

"My God, what on earth did you say to them" asked Nicola.

"I knocked on the door and when it was answered I said " I`m Nicola Sturgeon`s chauffeur and I've killed the cow".


 whistle:

http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=8111.msg611547#msg611547
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Offline boogs

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #261 on: June 06, 2017, 07:11:16 AM »
Not the right place I know  redface:



Nicola Sturgeon is touring Perthshire in the First Minister`s chauffeur driven car.

Suddenly a cow jumps into the road, the car hits it full on and comes to a stop.

Nicola, in her normal jaunty manner, says to the chauffeur

"You were driving, get out and see what was the matter"

The chauffeur gets out and reports, " The animal is dead".

"You were driving, go and tell the farmer" said Nicola, "I can`t afford to be blamed for anything".

The driver trudges up the track to the farmhouse and returns five hours later, totally plastered, his hair all ruffled and a big grin on his face.

"My God, what happened to you", asked Nicola.

The chauffeur replied "Well, when I got there, the farmer opened his best bottle of Malt Whisky, the wife gave me a slap-up meal and the daughter made love to me"

"My God, what on earth did you say to them" asked Nicola.

"I knocked on the door and when it was answered I said " I`m Nicola Sturgeon`s chauffeur and I've killed the cow".


 whistle:

http://www.virtual-pub.com/SMF/index.php?topic=8111.msg611547#msg611547


AFFS   redface:
You only get one chance at this life so make the most of it .

Offline Grumpmeister

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Re: The World's most offensive joke
« Reply #262 on: June 06, 2017, 08:33:46 AM »
Don't care that it's an affs, I'm currently cleaning coffee out of the monitor.  lol:
Life is all about finding people that are your kind of crazy.