Disgusterous
« previous next »
Pages: [1] 2   Go Down

Author Topic: Sick Notes  (Read 5403 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Miss Demeanour

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 36011
  • Reputation: 2
Sick Notes
« on: March 18, 2009, 06:47:14 PM »
A resource for all VP members who need an original idea for a day off work

"*cough* I can't come into work today. I have Ebola. I'll be in tomorrow

I fractured my uterus

Blue flu

I won't be coming in to work. The voices told me to clean all the guns today

When I got up this morning, I took two Ex-Lax in addition to my Prozac. I can't get off the toilet, but I feel good about it

I can't come in to work today because I'll be stalking my previous boss, who fired me for not showing up for work. OK?

I sprained my wrist cooking dinner in the microwave last nite

I won't be in today....my hair wont start

The blankets were too heavy for me to lift so I was stuck in bed all day
Logged
Skubber

Online Barman

  • Administrator
  • Needs to get out more...
  • *****
  • Posts: 152176
  • Reputation: -50
  • Since 1960...
    • Virtual Pub!
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2009, 05:40:38 AM »
Those voices can be a bugger at times....  surrender:
Logged
Pro Skub  Thumbs:

Offline Bar Wench

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 13786
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #2 on: March 19, 2009, 09:04:36 AM »
I like my voices, I am never alone.  cloud9:
Logged

Offline Darwins Selection

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 39138
  • Reputation: 6
  • I mostly despair
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #3 on: March 19, 2009, 12:41:19 PM »
Quote from: Bar Wench on March 19, 2009, 09:04:36 AM
I like my voices, I am never alone.  cloud9:

"We are never alone"
Logged
I mostly despair

Offline Nick

  • Needs to get out more...
  • ******
  • Posts: 108248
  • Reputation: -115
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #4 on: March 19, 2009, 12:42:37 PM »
You have the same problem? WHat do yours tell you?
Logged
Warning: May contain Skub
Cat sitter extraordinaire
Semi-professional crocodile

Offline Darwins Selection

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 39138
  • Reputation: 6
  • I mostly despair
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #5 on: March 19, 2009, 12:45:28 PM »
Quote from: Nick on March 19, 2009, 12:42:37 PM
You have the same problem? WHat do yours tell you?

Jesus wants me for a sunbeam.

Logged
I mostly despair

Offline Bar Wench

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 13786
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #6 on: March 19, 2009, 12:59:53 PM »
Quote from: Nick on March 19, 2009, 12:42:37 PM
You have the same problem? WHat do yours tell you?

Depends on the day. Today they are saying that BM is a bastard and that I should go in the sunshine and frolic and that some people would really be better off with a pencil stabbed between the eyes.
Logged

Offline Snoopy

  • Administrator
  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 54191
  • Reputation: 0
  • In the Prime of Senility
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #7 on: March 19, 2009, 01:23:17 PM »
Now we know why your employer will only let you have a wax crayon.
Logged
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Bar Wench

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 13786
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #8 on: March 19, 2009, 01:51:16 PM »
Chalk actually.
Logged

Offline Snoopy

  • Administrator
  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 54191
  • Reputation: 0
  • In the Prime of Senility
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #9 on: March 19, 2009, 02:20:26 PM »
 lol: lol: lol:

And one of those soft "roll-up" keyboards?
Logged
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Miss Demeanour

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 36011
  • Reputation: 2
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #10 on: March 19, 2009, 02:23:33 PM »
Quote from: Snoopy on March 19, 2009, 02:20:26 PM
lol: lol: lol:

And one of those soft "roll-up" keyboards?

But she can still hit people with those  eeek:
Logged
Skubber

Offline Bar Wench

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 13786
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #11 on: March 19, 2009, 02:44:21 PM »
Not unless they unlock the door I can't!
Logged

Offline Miss Demeanour

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 36011
  • Reputation: 2
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #12 on: March 19, 2009, 02:46:46 PM »
what about when you have your daily constitutional  rubschin:
Logged
Skubber

Offline Snoopy

  • Administrator
  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 54191
  • Reputation: 0
  • In the Prime of Senility
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #13 on: March 19, 2009, 02:48:19 PM »
Logged
I used to have a handle on life but it broke.

Offline Bar Wench

  • Power Poster
  • *****
  • Posts: 13786
  • Reputation: 0
Re: Sick Notes
« Reply #14 on: March 19, 2009, 02:49:34 PM »
http://www.shewee.com/

I use one of these and I empty it out of the window.
Logged
Pages: [1] 2   Go Up
« previous next »