Pretentious menu translations please (see also Uxbridge English Dictionary)

[Nick]

Going here on Sunday. Any suggestions???

S T a R T e R S
Carrot soup, smoked crème fraiche
Chicken liver pate, apple & raisin chutney, toasted focaccia
Lambs tongue, chickpea, chorizo, goats curd & gremolata
Port poached pear, chicory, beetroot, horseradish, sticky walnuts and mustard dressing (N)
M a I n S
Roast beef, honey roast carrots, green beans, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding
Pork belly, pickled chicory, Berkswell polenta, pine nut & raisin dressing (N)
Goats cheese gnocchi, prune, kale, deep fried capers and baby artichokes
Venison osso bucco, saffron risotto, root vegetables
S I d e S
Hand cut truffle & parmesan chips 3
Braised red cabbage, golden sultanas 4
Honey roast chantenay carrots 4
D e S S e R T S
Vanilla crème brûlée
Chocolate delice, hazelnuts, peanut brittle and salted caramel ice cream (N)
Sticky toffee pudding & toffee sauce, walnut semi-freddo (N)
Caramelised pineapple, yoghurt, chilli and lime (N)
C H e e S e
Gortnamona, quince jelly & cheese biscuits (N) 4

[Grumpmeister]

S T a R T e R S
Carrot soup, smoked crème fraiche
Chicken liver pate, apple & raisin chutney, toasted focaccia
Lambs tongue, chickpea, chorizo, goats curd & gremolata A variant of Taramasalata made from Gremlins
Port poached pear, chicory, beetroot, horseradish, sticky walnuts and mustard dressing (N) The Chef was excited
M a I n S
Roast beef, honey roast carrots, green beans, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding
Pork belly, pickled chicory, Berkswell polenta, pine nut & raisin dressing (N) Polenta a la Nick
Goats cheese gnocchi, prune, kale, deep fried capers and baby artichokes
Venison osso bucco, saffron risotto, root vegetables
S I d e S
Hand cut truffle & parmesan chips 3
Braised red cabbage, golden sultanas 4
Honey roast chantenay carrots 4
D e S S e R T S
Vanilla crème brûlée
Chocolate delice, hazelnuts, peanut brittle and salted caramel ice cream (N)
Sticky toffee pudding & toffee sauce, walnut semi-freddo (N) Half of Fred's walnut
Caramelised pineapple, yoghurt, chilli and lime (N)
C H e e S e
Gortnamona, quince jelly & cheese biscuits (N) 4 Recipe a la Klaatu

[Nick]

You have the right idea 

I may have to annoy the serving minions by demanding a translation 

[Grumpmeister]

You have the right idea 

I may have to annoy the serving minions by demanding a translation 

And the serving minions will have their revenge by getting the chefs to add 'extras' to your meal... 

[Nick]

 

[miss Tchevious]

S T a R T e R S
Carrot soup, smoked crème fraiche
Chicken liver pate, apple & raisin chutney, toasted focaccia
Lambs tongue, chickpea, chorizo, goats curd & gremolata A variant of Taramasalata made from Gremlins
Port poached pear, chicory, beetroot, horseradish, sticky walnuts and mustard dressing (N) The Chef was excited
M a I n S
Roast beef, honey roast carrots, green beans, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding
Pork belly, pickled chicory, Berkswell polenta, pine nut & raisin dressing (N) Polenta a la Nick
Goats cheese gnocchi, prune, kale, deep fried capers and baby artichokes
Venison osso bucco, saffron risotto, root vegetables
S I d e S
Hand cut truffle & parmesan chips 3
Braised red cabbage, golden sultanas 4
Honey roast chantenay carrots 4
D e S S e R T S
Vanilla crème brûlée
Chocolate delice, hazelnuts, peanut brittle and salted caramel ice cream (N)
Sticky toffee pudding & toffee sauce, walnut semi-freddo (N) Half of Fred's walnut
Caramelised pineapple, yoghurt, chilli and lime (N)
C H e e S e
Gortnamona, quince jelly & cheese biscuits (N) 4 Recipe a la Klaatu

 

very good.

oh, and "Gortnamona" is what Apey says when the bill comes. 

[Steve]

  ^, ^^, ^^^ etc

[Darwins Selection]

S T a R T e R S
Carrot soup, smoked crème fraiche
Chicken liver pate, apple & raisin chutney, toasted focaccia
Lambs tongue, chickpea, chorizo, goats curd & gremolata A variant of Taramasalata made from Gremlins
Port poached pear, chicory, beetroot, horseradish, sticky walnuts and mustard dressing (N) The Chef was excited
M a I n S
Roast beef, honey roast carrots, green beans, roast potatoes, Yorkshire pudding
Pork belly, pickled chicory, Berkswell polenta, pine nut & raisin dressing (N) Polenta a la Nick
Goats cheese gnocchi, prune, kale, deep fried capers and baby artichokes
Venison osso bucco, saffron risotto, root vegetables
S I d e S
Hand cut truffle & parmesan chips 3
Braised red cabbage, golden sultanas 4
Honey roast chantenay carrots 4
D e S S e R T S
Vanilla crème brûlée
Chocolate delice, hazelnuts, peanut brittle and salted caramel ice cream (N)
Sticky toffee pudding & toffee sauce, walnut semi-freddo (N) Half of Fred's walnut
Caramelised pineapple, yoghurt, chilli and lime (N)
C H e e S e
Gortnamona, quince jelly & cheese biscuits (N) 4 Recipe a la Klaatu

 

Hand cut truffle & parmesan chips = Mushroom Wotsits

[Miss Demeanour]

What difference does cutting something by hand  or cutting it with some device or other  have ???  Apart from adding pounds to the bill for increased labour costs 

[Nick]

What difference does cutting something by hand  or cutting it with some device or other  have ???  Apart from adding pounds to the bill for increased labour costs 

 

[Steve]

What difference does cutting something by hand  or cutting it with some device or other  have ???  Apart from adding pounds to the bill for increased labour costs 

Less bogie content if cut by machine

[Nick]

Semi freddo turned out to be fvcking ice cream 
The Boy ordered the truffle and parmesan chips (£3 extra) and did not like them. I ate them. Yumster